A Little Love Letter on Loving Yourself

Happy Valentine’s Day!! I’ll admit it – I’m a total sucker for love. But rather than focus on the kind of love we give to others, I wanted to focus on the kind of love we give ourselves today. In other words, loving yourself. Regardless of your relationship status at the moment or thoughts on Valentine’s Day as a holiday, I think it’s a great reminder to take a minute and give yourself some major love. Take a minute today and write a little letter as a reminder that you should always be loving yourself first. After all – there’s no relationship in the world that is more important than the one you have with yourself.

We talk all the time about empowerment. How important it is to empower and support those around us. But what about empowering ourselves? We put the needs and wants of others constantly before ourselves. It’s time to love ourselves. Put yourself first. Be the selfish (the good kind!).

I just finished I AM THAT GIRL by Alexis Jones (HIGHLY recommend!!) and I absolutely LOVED her message on self love and putting yourself first. Alexis says:

“Learning to listen to yourself and knowing what you need and when you need it is step one to becoming the good kind of selfish. Asking for it is the next step… when you put your needs last, you’re like a plant without water that’s worried about providing enough shade for others. But if that plant doesn’t have water to grow, it will shrivel up and die, providing no shade or comfort for others anyway.”

Whoa. That is so spot on. Think about it this way: how often do you commit to something because you want to be a “yes woman,” only to realize later on you over-committed yourself or didn’t want to do that thing to begin with. You know that friend that always flakes? Or the times you’ve flaked on your plans because you realize at the last minute you totally overwhelmed your schedule with too many plans and commitments? If we learn to be honest with ourselves and set realistic expectations for what we can do and how much energy we can exert, we’ll be better people for it. She goes on to say:

Remember your time is precious, as are you, so start acting like it. Your time is important, your energy is finite, and your attention is precious, so value who and where you spend it accordingly. You are the only one who can set those kinds of expectations and teach people how to treat you. Be selfish, and I promise everyone will benefit.”

Start by taking some me time. A little bit every day. You deserve it.

Call me a romantic, an optimist, or delusional, but I think love should be celebrated every day. Especially love for ourselves.

Take a moment for yourself today and say thank you to yourself. The practice of self-love doesn’t always feel natural, but over time it will feel good. At the end of the day, the way you treat yourself sets the standard for how you treat others.

Whatever your plans are today, make it a good one – and be sure to spoil yourself rotten, even if it’s just with a little self-love, gratitude, and me time!

xx, Amy

dress: vici | hat: lack of color (similar) | belt: b-low the belt

shoes: isabel marant | bag: gucci

40 Discussion to this post

  1. Briana says:

    Lovely outfit! This is a great idea for a new post!

    Briana
    http://beyoutifulbrunette.blogspot.com/

  2. Areli says:

    Amy this dress is so cute and yes self love is so important too. happy v-day!!!
    xx,
    Areli’s April
    Areli’s April on Bloglovin

  3. Lola says:

    This is such a great article, really inspiring:D
    Gorgeous dress, I love how you accessorized it 😉

    http://thewonderfashion.blogspot.com

  4. Adam says:

    Very stylish! gotta love the hat too 🙂

    http://twitter.com/averageguystyle

  5. Jessi Malay says:

    Aw love what you wrote in this post babe 🙂 Self love and putting yourself first is so important!! Hope you have an amazing Valentine’s Day filled with lots of love and laughter <3 <3

    XOXO, Jessi
    http://www.mywhitet.com/pink-patent-lace-for-valentines-day/

  6. Cindy Elena says:

    Self love is always important!
    I love your outfit, it’s perfect for Spring

    xo | Cindy
    http://www.boringclothes.com

  7. Julie says:

    I’m with ya babe! In my 20’s I’d be my own worst critic! Now that I’m in my 30’s I’m learning to be my biggest fan! If you can’t love yourself who can right? Lovely look- perfect for the transition into spring!

    Thank you for visiting babe, hope to see you back to check out my latest!

    Xx- Julie | Haute Khuuture Blog

  8. Leah says:

    I could not agree more!!! Love yourself baby!!! This is probably my favorite blog post I’ve read in a while, so well said. Love your outfit too!
    xx Leah

    http://www.fashtrav.com

  9. Paula says:

    That book have some serious good quotes!! I always love that kind of books, they make me feel so positive and I realized that being selfish is essential if you want to have a great relation with your self and your loved ones

    http://www.blossomikebana.com

  10. Avellia says:

    great look…

    Mind to visit my page?
    Regards,
    Mrs. Aa
    http://www.bymrsaa.com

  11. What a fitting post for Valentine’s Day! I think self love is super important and taking time for yourself is crucial. As a mom, it is hard to find time for yourself as well but I’ve noticed that over committing myself also makes me less patient, stressed, and more frantic. I love this reminder and this post. You look gorgeous in these photos and I love the dress and your hair! xoxo, Christine
    http://dailykongfidence.com/

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Aw, thank you Christine!! I am so impressed at how you manage to do it all and look flawless while doing so. It’s not easy to balance everything life throws at you in addition to the most important job of all – being a mother! You are such an inspiration and motivate me so much to put my all into everything I do, and *try* to look good while doing so! xx

  12. Jo says:

    Amy I absolutely love this super well written post (when I saw this post on IG earlier, I knew I wanted to read it). Only those who know how to love yourselves can love others around you. I have been very stressed over family, work and this blogging thing so I am finding so little time for myself lately! This is a great reminder as I need to take action and start have some “me time” to recharge!

    xo,
    Jo
    http://www.glamfashionbook.com

    • Amy Zhang says:

      Hi Jo!! Thanks so much for stopping by. I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been stressed lately – anytime you need a listening ear, just LMK! I have definitely been in the same spot and can relate 100% to how you’re feeling. Give yourself a little bit of me time and see you how you feel!! xx

  13. Adi says:

    Perfect look, babe!! And I’ll have to check out “I am that Girl” pretty soon!
    Adi xx
    http://www.fancycorrectitude.com
    http://www.instagram.com/fancycorrectitude

  14. Rachel says:

    Everything is perfect on you! Great post!

    http://chicglamstyle.com

  15. Floortje says:

    That dress looks gorgeous on you love! Perfect look!
    Hope you had a great V-day!

    Xx,

    || FLOORTJELOVES ||

    http://www.floortjeloves.com
    http://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/floortjeloves-12198253

  16. Neha says:

    You look beautiful babes… and I love your footwear too <3… Hugs, Neha

    http://www.theinstylejournal.com

  17. Well said, self love comes first and is so very important. Love the bag and shoes. You look great!

    Ann-Marie | http://facetocurls.com

  18. Stella says:

    Wonderful post! I’m still really critical with myself and should definitely change this. But this is also natural. One always long for something more…
    gorgeous look!!

  19. Yasmin says:

    Love that quote, it spoke to me, thanks for sharing it with us <3 Isabel Marant Dicker boots tho!!!

    xo, Yasmin
    I AM YASMIN

  20. Jalisa says:

    That dress looks so beautiful on you, girlie, and I love the way you’ve styled it with the hat and white waist belt, so boho chic! I couldn’t agree more, self-love is so important because we really can’t give what we ourselves don’t have. I’ll have to check out that book, the pieces you’ve shared was so deep and true. Thanks from sharing, beauty,a and I hope you’re having a great week so far!

    XO,

    Jalisa
    http://www.thestylecontour.com

  21. anika says:

    LOVE your outfit! Hope you had a great valentines day 🙂

    xx theclosetchronicle.com

  22. Jessie says:

    Hi Amy, I love those post so much! This is the best Valentine’s Day post I have read so far.

    I always tell myself that if I can’t love myself, who else will be able to love me? I have ordered ‘I Am That Girl’, totally inspired by your booklist post! Let’s exchange notes when I finish reading it.

    Xx, Jessie
    http://4evajessie.com/stay-active-with-grana/

  23. What a beautiful article!! Love how strong you sound and the message you give every girl who reads this article! You also look favbulous! Love your hat and bag in particular! Xx Susanne – http://bagatyou.com

  24. Adelina says:

    This is such a wonderful post darling! I loved reading this and I can’t agree more! Also you are gorgeous!! I hope we meet up sometime soon!! xx, Adelina

    http://www.thecharmingolive.com

  25. Lindsey says:

    This was a total eye opener- I had no idea about any of this! I just thought soy candles were fancy alternatives!

    Lindsey
    http://www.seamlesssea.com

  26. Rina says:

    I definitely need to take a peak at that book, I so agree with the messaging! We we’re totally on the same wave length for Valentines!

    xoxo Rina
    http://www.andshedressed.com

  27. […] You don’t put yourself first. Again, self-love is so important. When you forget to be kind to yourself, you invite stress, anxiety, and other negative […]

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